The First One

I might be single for the rest of my life.

Well.

Probably not. BUT, I’m fully convinced every time the ‘old-cat-lady’ fantasy goes running through my head that I’m a little bit psychic.

That’s not to say that I’ve never been…not single. In fact, for a good 5.5 – 6.8 years (depending on who you ask and what kind of mood they’re in) I was in a loving, amazing, crazy, totally unhealthy at times but ultimately life-changing relationship with a person I thought was my soul mate. And then it ended.

More on that later.

But, every once upon a time, (translation: every other day, sometimes more) I ask myself, “Self, how are you still on the market? You’re smart, you love football and know the rules (that’s how I know you’re for reals), and hell, I wouldn’t kick you out of bed...” And every time I’m greeted with, “(Shrug) When’s the Pats game on?”

So.

I’m detailing my search for the answer to that nagging question in part for accountability (hell, I have to start being honest with myself at some point and consider the fact that maybe, just maybe, my chronic singledom could perhaps be due to my tendency to fall asleep with Friends* DVDs blaring in the background or occasionally putting empty containers back in the refrigerator because the garbage is full) and in part to spare my friends having to hear about it anymore (I’m sensing an intervention may not be too far on the horizon).

Also, it will give me a place to showcase my ability to create long and meandering run-on sentences. Huzzah!

Here I go.

‘Cause my life’s a joke, I’m broke, and my love life is most definitely DOA.**
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*Brownie points to you if you read that and, with the title, can spot the soon-to-be recurring theme;)
**Ditto.
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